Bucket full of tears

For how much I wish to go home right now, it will not happen. I have a mission to complete. And yes, it is O levels. The result I'm getting doesn't really matter of what I'll be doing in future. So much that I feel like giving up. This year. This term. This week. This day. This hour. This minute. This second. I have lost hope in myself. Missing home. No one actually knows how I'm feeling.

But even so, I hate getting bad results.

All I know is that, it's going to be worth it. All I have to do is work harder. Much harder. It's not going to be easy, of this I am sure. Discipline is what I lack. Failing prelims gave me a big wake up call. In my head. Doesn't really show through my actions. Actually, it shows the opposite. I've been going to school late too often, sleeping in class every period, what next? Skip school? I swear, it was unintentional. Never wanted these to happen, but I can't promise that it wouldn't happen again.

I've been enduring this for almost 8 years, just 2 more months, why is it so difficult? In fact, it's lesser than that.

Forgive me for my bad results. I'll try harder. For now, I'll head to bed.

Ajay's coming to Singapore later. Her flight is at 1pm. I'll have a roommate tomorrow. Just tomorrow. May be back to post. And Alvin's wedding on Saturday.

Oh.my.god. There's so much going on on Saturday. Amath lesson in school, WBL at RP and Alvin's wedding at M hotel. Plus, I'm skipping tuition. Goshhhh. This is bad.

Goodnight,
P.